The Loss of a Friend

By Jerry Mack Grubbs

Friends are lost in different ways. Some die while others just drift away because of changing interests. Some friends are sacrificed through misunderstandings and disagreements. Then there are those whose friendship weather the storms of adversity and reach out even through miles of physical separation and remain attached regardless of life’s situations.

I was blessed to know such a friend. We met in Kmart of all places and struck up a conversation that developed into a friendship that has lasted many years. The sales lady who introduced us or was there at the counter with us was a petite girl who looked as though she should still be in junior high. I told her she looked too young to be working and she informed me that she was eighteen and working to save money to go to college. My newly discovered friend introduced himself as Tex and when I asked if that was a nickname he said, “Yes,” but offered no additional information.

I have long since forgotten the sales clerk’s name. I remember that she commented that I should be the one with the name Tex because of my southern accent. It is strange how I remember her smile but can’t remember her name. I also remember the necklace she wore. It was a gold chain with a small elongated flat piece of gold with an inscription. With her permission I reached over and took the small piece of gold in my hands and examined the words. The inscription said, “Love You.” “Is there a story behind those words,” I asked, thinking that it was probably from a boyfriend. “It belonged to my mother. My father gave it to me when she died six years ago. I never take it off,” she said. You were twelve when your mother passed away?” I asked. “Yes,” she commented. “And you have never had the necklace off since the day your father placed it around your neck?” I questioned. “That’s right,” she stated.

As I stared into the eyes of the sales clerk I suddenly remembered Tex. I had almost totally ignored him while I was caught up in the story of the sales clerk’s necklace. An unspoken communication had been taking place between the sales clerk and me during those brief moments of silence after she stopped talking. But remembering my manners, I looked Tex right in the face and said, “We should do something special for this young lady for introducing us.” Her face reddened just a little as she said, “Oh I couldn’t accept anything.” Her comment didn’t surprise me. Tex and I said our goodbyes to the sales clerk and headed out the door to get better acquainted.

We hit it off right from the start. I told Tex about my hobbies. He had never been up in a small plane so I encouraged him to come to the airport with me for a flight into the wild blue yonder. He agreed and off we went. That was the first of many adventures we shared. We became close friends and once or twice we went back to Kmart to visit the petite sales clerk who wore the necklace with the inscription “Love You” written on it. We never saw her again but we often reflected on what might have happened to her as she carved her way through life without the influence of a mother to laugh with her and console her when necessary. We kidded ourselves that when our batteries went low we would drop by Kmart and have her recharge us with her inviting smile.

Tex and I saw or talked to one another almost every day. I’m surprise that my wife Kaye didn’t complain about the time we spent together. She seemed to sense that there was a special bond between us. One day Tex disappeared and I had no contact with him for a year or so. I missed him but friendships don’t last long that travel a one-way street. Then one day he showed back up and we renewed our friendship immediately. It was like we had never been separated. He and I flew together, boated together, hunted together, and camped together many times. Other than the year we were lost to each other that I previously spoke of, we were almost inseparable. I have lost track of all the things we did together. Then, while I was on a canoe trip down the Green River of southern Utah, it happened. As I was paddling the canoe a feeling swept over me and I knew that something had happened to Tex. I knew he was gone. I told my wife Kaye that I just lost a good friend, one who had been with me on more expeditions than I could remember.

Sensing my loss, Kaye immediately jumped into the river to see if she could find Tex. See, Tex was my wristwatch. Tex was short for Timex Expedition. I knew I would never find Tex in that river. I chuckled at Kaye for thinking that she could find him in the fast moving muddy water. But bless her heart that didn’t stop her from trying. I finally persuaded her to get back into the canoe. I was saddened but not because I had lost a valuable watch. Tex was inexpensive but I’m a sentimental guy. I thought of how long we had been together and how many adventures or expeditions we had shared. I can replace the watch. I can’t replace all the years he gave me his time, served as my alarm clock, challenged me with his stopwatch and made sure I knew what day of the month it was. He never let me down except when his batteries died. A quick trip to Kmart always solved his battery problem and he went right back to ticking as before.

As I told you, I once lost Tex for a year but one Sunday morning, a young man came up to me and told me who had my watch. When I asked for the watch back, it was returned accompanied with an apology. In the meantime I had purchased another Timex Expedition but as soon as Tex was given back to me, I removed the newer watch and started wearing Tex once more. I don’t think Tex will be coming back this time. Tex is waterproof so he will continue to tick in the water and sand of the Green River until the battery fades and the electronic ticking stops. Then he will be silent and become part of the elements of nature. Before the ticking stops maybe some fish will learn how to tell time. Do you think the fish will be happier if they know what time of day it is? Probably not. When we were on the river, we didn’t worry about what time it was either.

I had a premonition that I shouldn’t wear Tex while I was on the river. The band was worn and he had slipped off my wrist a couple of times before. As I look back I don’t focus on what might-have-been had I heeded the premonition and not worn Tex on the river. I chose instead to reflect on the great expeditions we shared over the years. I also think of the petite Kmart sales clerk who sold Tex to me. Remember, she was the girl who wore the necklace with the inscription “Love You” written on it. I don’t remember her name but I do remember her smile. “Some friends come into our lives and are soon gone. Others last a lifetime.” I never expected Tex to last a lifetime but I will miss him just like I miss the smile of the young sales clerk at Kmart. Oh, the worth of a smile.

I grew to love that watch but it was just a watch. What I will always love are the adventures and memories we shared. No matter where Tex is now, I will always have my memories. Those of you who know me well know that I keep a daily journal. And each day in that journal I list the highlight of my day, the regret of the day, and what I am grateful for. You probably think that I listed loosing my friend Tex as my regret of that day on the river but you would be wrong. What I listed as the regret-of-the-day was that I didn’t have more of you there with me so I could enjoy your company and companionship. Just think I had Tex longer than the Kmart sales clerk had her mother by her side.